Sweet Sixteen

She used to follow me around the farm like a loyal dog. Clean the stall, fix the tractor, cultivate the crops, she knew her Dad needed the guidance that only she could provide. As time passed changes came. Barn boots have been replaced by RocketDogs and where Jinn's brush could be found now a cell phone resides. Dad? well... Dad can handle things on his own thanks to the years of Mentoring from his little girl.
Changes... what a plethora of emotions attached to that word. My oldest looking at colleges, my youngest doubling in size every month and my girl... my sweet sixteen, lets go there.
It was like yesterday (actually seems like 6 to 8 years at the most) we were at St. Francis. It was early morning. I was frustrated as I watched a rotund nurse trying to attach cardiac monitor clips to my new born girl with the gingerliness of a blacksmith. Unable to get the job done, She turned to get help and I swiftly slid my hand under the incubator and clicked the electrode to the pad. As the monitor picked up the signal... Flash! I'm in her bedroom on Irving St tucking her in... Flash! A new puppy named Jack and sledding in the backyard... Flash! An amazing essay and a horse named Jinn... Flash! Boobs! Oh my God! Flash! Cell phone... Flash! High school... Flash! Instant messaging... Flash! Boys!... (I hate boys) Flash! "Dad I want a car" Flash! $$$$$
Flash... of my camera as I snap shots of a beautiful young woman with her friends on the Tennessee River boat during her sweet sixteen celebration.
And now, as tears roll down my cheeks, I tap away trying to collect thoughts. It's very hard with all this flashing and spinning going on around me. I wish I could play a less static role in her life. She is so dynamic and complex, and at the same time simple and natural. I want to be one of her best friends. Dads don't have the privilege of that roll I guess, and my efforts to do so have left me looking like a dork or something really odd to her. I don't mean to come across like that, Sorry.
Kenny Chesney sings it in the song "Don't Blink", The words to this song written from the view from the eyes of a 100 year old man. At 42, I feel a lot of these sentiments already.
Baby, I'm so excited for all the great things you have yet to experience, and for all the experiences that have brought you to this moment. Wow how exciting to be so young with so much life ahead of you. Just one more thing, a simple request...If you could grant me one wish before I turn 100... It would be to take one more walk across a pasture somewhere... both of us wearing barn boots.

Changes

I just can't believe the amount of change that occurs in one man's lifetime. I looked back in the archive of the Basegasket Blog and stared in awe. From "Sea of People, Ebb and Flow", I see a young man graduating from High School, not a care in the world. Now, just a few years later, struggles with life's big decisions, school, travels, relationships...like a grown man does.

In "Sweet Sixteen", I see a young girl with all her needs fulfilled. Today, she deals with a broken-down 4 runner and no ride home. Home? Home will always be home, the home in the Gulfwood SD. Even home has changed, she has her own home now. A cute little apartment just off the UTC campus.

"End of an Era", meant the beginning of another, for my youngest. From bats, balls and bases to Fender, Fuchs and feedback. He doesn't show it now, but I think he's planning some changes as well.

I've posted many times about my motorcycle. Well, it's gone too. As a result of changes in other peoples lives around me, it caused changes in my life. That old bike was a big part of my world for 10 years. I remember wanting and waiting for it.

I used to think keeping a blog was very important. I thought it was imperative that someone make record of this wonderful life. With no post from me in a year, you would think I changed my mind about that too. Not true, I still do. I guess I just got caught in the spin of this ever changing life.

Today I have a new goal. It's a difficult target, but do-able. And no, it's not 1/10 scale.